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Giving It Up

My daughter Abi turned thirteen recently andused to live in a farmhouse right in the
as head of the family she thinks it's aboutmiddle of one of these estates. Pheasants
time her parents became vegetarians. She haswere as common as pigeons and sparrows are in
been a convert, with occasional lapses, fortown. It was not at all unusual to see two or
around two years. I'm certainly not againstthree elderly gents stroll past our house,
the idea. We hardly eat meat anyway; just thestepping stiff-legged over barbed wire fences
odd bacon sandwich and an extremely rare(ouch), with their broken shotguns cradled
steak (rare in the numerical rather than theover one arm and their labradors at heel.Now,
French culinary sense), but it would be goodyou might think I'm out of sympathy with the
to lose that feeling of guilt experiencedhunting fraternity, and you'd be right, up to
when a cow looks at you over the fence witha point, although it's true I did a lot of
those mournful eyes.Actually the cow is notfishing in my early teens, and I once owned a
at all sad - it's probably wondering if youbeautiful .22 BSA air rifle with an oiled
are going to pass it some of that long greenstock and a rifled barrel. I gave up fishing
grass on the other side of the fence, but thewhen I discovered girls, and I exchanged the
guilt is real enough.Of course, not everybodyrifle for my first guitar and never looked
feels that way. In another life I used to beback.As a young teenager, part of my reading
a musician and I remember driving to a gigwas about the safari hunters of Africa and
with a black American blues singer calledIndia, last of a dying breed. One of the most
Johnnie Mars. I pointed out some ducks whichinteresting of these was Jim Corbett. He
were flying low over the band bus inbecame well known as a writer and his best
formation. Johnnie looked up and said yep, hebook was probably 'The Man-Eaters of Kumaon'.
thought they were mighty fine, and after aHe had respect and even love for the
moment, 'Especially with roast potatoes'.Thisman-eaters that he had to shoot. He was not
was said without a trace of irony. He told mejust a hunter; he was also a naturalist and
later, with the same straight face, that hean early conservationalist, who warned
was well known in East Poland and Latvia,against 'the indiscriminate hunting of the
which reminded me irresistibly of Dorothytiger, which if not controlled would
Parker's line about being famous in twoeventually deprive India of the finest of her
continents - 'Greenland and Iceland'.Anyway,fauna'.About this time I discovered two great
as I said, I'd like to become a vegetarian,American writers; Hemingway via 'The Green
but I think you have to pick the right time.Hills of Africa', written in 1933, and
It's like giving up smoking, something IWilliam Faulkner through 'The Bear'. Written
finally managed to do ten years ago afterin 1942 as a long short story, 'The Bear' is
many attempts. One day, all the conditionsFaulkner at his prophetic best. It's about a
were right and I stopped, just likegroup of men and boys who go on a hunting
that.That's how I imagine it would be whentrip every year', and each time they have to
giving up meat, although as far as I know,drive further to find the wilderness as the
meat is not addictive. There'll be noMississippi Delta shrinks. At the time the
retrievals of half used packs of bacon fromstory was written, conservation was not at
the bin, or furtive trips to the corner shop,all fashionable, nor was it twenty years
('Just going to take the dog around thelater when I read it, but it made me realize
block, dear. Won't be long').Thesethat there could be a link between hunting
ruminations (isn't that what cows do? - Ed)and conservation.I have no desire to hunt or
were brought on by the fact that we'veshoot any animal, but I'm hardly in a
recently moved house. We're now twelve milesposition to criticize anyone else while I
further north and within sight of the Moraystill eat meat. The arguments in favour of
Firth. (In Scotland an estuary is called ahunting are not easy to refute. For instance,
firth, so for example we have the Firth ofit's claimed that without foxhunting, farmers
Forth - see?). Anyway, in those few miles,would quickly eradicate the fox and that in
we've moved out of the Highlands and onto theScotland the Red deer population would soar
coastal plain, which drops gently down to thewithout adequate control.Maybe, but I can't
sea, about six miles away, giving us a clearhelp thinking Oscar Wilde got it right when
view of the few solitary cottages andhe wrote about 'The unspeakable in pursuit of
farmhouses in the area, plus the remains ofthe uneatable'. Besides, as a solution to the
Duffus castle and the Lossiemouthdeer population problem, I'm for the
lighthouse.All this is very different fromre-introduction of the wolf, absent from the
the Highlands, with its hills and valleys,Scottish Highlands since before Bonnie Prince
rough ravines and forests. Almost a differentCharlie went home to Italy. This is a serious
country, almost a different people. Beforeand considered proposition, now championed by
the Jacobite uprising in the 18th century andthe Green Party, and it feels right to me. It
the subsequent destruction of the clanworks in Montana - why not here in the
system, the 'wild, wykked hieland men' usedHighlands? In the meantime, at least I've
to swoop down onto the coastal plain, stealmoved out of earshot of the shotguns on the
all the cattle they could cope with, burn aestate.James Donaldson CollinsJames Donaldson
few cottages and disappear back into theCollins is an artist and writer. He lives in
hills.Well, the clans are no longer a force,the Highlands of Scotland with his wife,
and instead there are large shooting estates,daughter and three dogs. His interests are
sometimes owned by old established familiesconservation, history, science fiction, chess
and sometimes by wealthy newcomers. Clientsand snooker. He also claims to play guitar
pay the equivalent of the price of a goodlike a ringing a bell.
second hand car for a few days shooting. We



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